Saturday, June 2, 2007

My Rules

I was recently tagged for two more memes! Yay!

This one, started by one of my very favorite bloggers Rachel Anne at Home Sanctuary is about rules. Here is her description:

"My Personal Policies

I think it would be safe to say that we all have personal rules that we live by. Surely it's not just ME. I'm not talking about moral rules, like "Do not kill." I'm talking about the silly policies we impose on ourselves, like "Never eat anything you can't identify," or "Don't step on sidewalk cracks." For some reason, I started mentally listing the quirky rules I follow and got curious about other people's personal rules.

As an added bonus, I will include 5 parenting policies I USED to think I would follow before I actually became a parent: (feel free to add yours, too!)"

Be sure to check out Rachel Anne's list of personal rules and pre-parenting policies!

Here are mine (if you do any of these things, that's fine, these are just my rules for ME):

1. Only even numbers. Of soap dispenser squirts. Number of knocks on a door. Digits in telephone numbers.

2. No onions, ever. If a recipe calls for onions, I use onion powder, instead. And just a smidge.

3. No talking or responding to small talk while in a bathroom stall. I just pretend I can't hear someone who is trying to speak with me, until I emerge from the stall.

4. Toilet paper rolls should roll OVER, not under!

5. No making or answering calls on the cell phone while in public or at another person's house, other than for emergencies or important questions. And no call waiting. I am low tech! I just have a pay-as-you-go cell phone (which I leave, on purpose, in the car) and a phone w/answering machine! At least it isn't a rotary dial, right?

6. Paper towels are NOT napkins! This is one of the only things Penn does that drive me crazy! He thinks I am silly because I think there is a big difference between paper towels and paper napkins. We only use cloth for sit down meals. The rest of the time, it's paper napkins. But not paper towels!!

7. No wearing shoes inside the house, unless I'm cleaning, cooking, or doing laundry. Then I wear my "house shoes" (keds) to support my arches. Very Mr Rogers of me, right? But as soon as I've finished my task, I take them off. I don't feel like I'm INSIDE if I'm wearing shoes. Sorry, Flylady!

8. No socks with loafers! (I slather on lotion and wear socks to bed to make up for the damage.) And I wear loafers year round. I usually have two pair, one casual and one a little dressier. I just wear themuntil they start to look worn, then replace. I am not a shoe person. During summer my loafers don't have backs and I do buy a new pair of Stephen Bonannostyle sandals every Memorial Day. Also, in winter I add a pair of jodphur boots to the mix. But 95% of the time, it's loafers. Sans socks, of course!

9. Diet Cherry Coke is appropriate any time of day. I don't drink coffee, so I have my first DCC in the am. And it might not be proper etiquette to do so, but it tastes best out of the can.

10. No reading the bulletin during the sermon. I always maintain eye contact and look interested to every sermon, speech, or classroom lecture. Even if my mind is wandering.

Okay! Now for the most fun part. My pre-baby parenting rules:

1. No TV until my child is two.

I fell so far short of this goal. I know my pregnant self would never have BELIEVED it, but my son has been started watching Eebee Baby before six months. I tried a couple of shows and this one made him smile and laugh every time. Now he watches Sesame Street Daily, while he plays. For shame!

2. My child shall always be well kempt. Matching, clean, wrinkle-free outfits. Combed hair. Squeaky clean face.

Hmmm. Most of the time, if his clothes are reasonably clean, he has a fresh diaper (I'm still a stickler about that), and there is no food visible in his hair or on his face, I am happy. His hair never stays "just so" and honestly, who cares about wrinkles!?

3. My child will eat only nutritious, whole, organic, food, made by me. My child will never be introduced to junk food or fast food by me. Once he is play date age he can have fast food only if the other children are eating McDonalds. And sweets shall be the rarest of treats.

Ha! I haven't made a THING out of my fancy schmancy baby food cookbook. I haven't even used the top of the line Cuisinart I bought expressly for this purpose! I have no excuse, other than laziness. Becoming a mother hasn't turned me into a health nut, like I thought it would.

And, I DID take Nicknack through the McDs drivethrough about a month ago. He never eats anything and I decided that if he would eat a happy meal, it was better than nothing. He ate a whole chicken nugget and most of a second nugget. I did order the meal with apple slices and milk (rather than fries). I still intend to resist fast food and junk food as much as possible. But not with the passion and strictness that I'd envisioned.

Parenting is the simplest thing in the world before you have a child, isn't it?

Here is photographic evidence that we have broken all three rules, just this morning.

You'll notice that Nicknack has found a Hershey's Kiss under the sofa. He has consumed candy (rule 3) and gotten it all over himself (and said sofa, which we just had professionally cleaned). Additionally, both he and the floor are covered in crumbs from a piece of teething toast. Pretty unkempt (rule 2), don't you think? Please also note that he is watching television (rule 1), because he took a too-short morning nap and was a crank. I have washed his face and removed his chocolatey pants, but I haven't rushed him to the tub or even changed his shirt (yet). At least his diaper is fresh.





Okay, now it's your turn! I'm tagging everyone, because I really want to know all of your rules! So if you're a semi-regular reader or just visiting for the first time, tag! You're it. Please leave a message in the comments so that others will know to visit your blog to read your rules. Or, if you want, you can just tell us about your personal policies in the comments. Inquiring minds want to know!!

8 comments:

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Hey, thanks for stopping by 2nd Cup! I think this is a great post. I know I have rules to live by, I just can't think of them quite yet, but I'd like to! And it's so cute how you posted a picture wherein the rules were all obliterated at once! Welcome to parenting!

Kristin said...

I LOVE this post. One of my best friends sends me "rules" randomly through email or text messages of things that happen to her that she thinks shouldn't!!! It always cracks me up just as your post just did!!

Chrystal said...

This is GREAT! Thanks for sharing those beautiful pics and also for visiting my blog!

groovyoldlady said...

Hilarious! I did keep my parenting rules for child one and then I went all judgmental on friends who's children weren't so compliant. Then I had child 2 and all judgmental tendencies morphed quickly into sympathy. After two more, I have immense empathy for ANYONE who is blessed with children.

Personal rules?

The day cannot progress unless I am dressed and shod and my bed is made. ( I MUST wear shoes inside and out. Orthotics, you know!)

Tea absolutely cannot be made in the microwave. EVER. The water must come to a complete boil in a kettle and the cup must be filled within 1/4 " of the top of the cup or I feel cheated. Lipton's is anathema!

Dusting must precede vacuuming. My husband does not believe this tenet, so I cannot watch when he sweetly cleans a room for me. I also refuse to inspect any room that he cleans because I am not going to insult his kindness by complaining about or redoing his work.

MamaCass said...

This is so funny to me because I also had pre-parenting rules like no eating in the living room or the car, a strict bedtime, etc... And I have broken everyone of them.

Rachel Anne said...

Great rules! I can't imagine loafers with no socks... don't your feet get sweaty??

Love, love, love the picks of Nicknack...a perfect illustration of how rules should be more like guidelines when it comes to kids.

Thanks for playing along...I've had fun reading other people's personal policies. I don't feel quite so strange, now.

Prairie Rose said...

Okay, I responded to your meme...

Alana said...

I loved the picture of him facing the camera...rules are meant to be broken, right? I'll try to list my "rules" soon. I've been out of town for a few days. I think it might take me a bit to catch up on everything!