Just Stick with Nordstrom, People

My embarrassingly expensive and ridiculously enormous brassiere recently broke. I was bending over doing something acrobatic (no doubt) w/Nicknack at tumbling class when I heard it snap. Darn. It was my favorite "hooter-holder."

It's only a few months old and Nordstrom has such a generous return policy that I'm tempted to call them and inquire about a replacement. I've been washing it in a mesh lingerie bag, so I don't think it should have snapped after just a season of use. But since I've worn it almost every day (I have a back up that I only wear when my favorite is in the wash), I probably got my money's worth. I even wore it to tennis, under a sports bra!

It's one of those foam "t-shirt" bras, which I love because no matter what you wear over it you get lots of coverage. You know what I mean?

In an attempt to be frugal, I decided to replace it with a much less expensive version from an online source. Same size and nearly identical.

While I was at it I ordered two other bras, because this incident made me realize that I need more than one flattering bra. Also four pair of undies that matched the first bra. And eight pair that matched the other two bras. So much for saving money. But I got almost all those items for just a little more than the original bra.

Well, the package arrived today. I was so excited. About underwear. But I was.

I opened the package and tried on the first bra. Too large. Wow. I didn't know they made bras too large for me, but apparently they do!

I tried on the second bra. Too small. I looked at the tag and realized it was one size smaller than the item I'd ordered and didn't match the itemized packing slip.

The third bra I pulled out of the bag was the wrong color. White. And tiny. Well, to me. I haven't worn a C-cup since high school!

I reached in again and found another bra - the one I'd ordered. It fit... but was all wrong in all the wrong places. Back into the bag it went.

I pulled out four pair of undies. Cute. Finally, something I ordered that fit. Woohoo!

Then I reached into the bag to retrieve the eight pink undies that should have been the last thing in the package.

I pulled out a bra. Another white 34C. Hmm.

I pulled out another. And another. And another. And another!

They'd sent me eight little white bras instead of my undies!

Don't you think the person packing the bag might have noticed that someone was REALLY excited about that white bra, to order eight!? Who orders eight bras!? Does anyone actually own that many bras, much less order them all (plus the other three) at one time?

Anyway, after all my ordering I have exactly four pair of underwear. Everything else has to go back. And tomorrow I will head to Nordstrom to replace the original.

I heart Nordstrom.